Let's play the Waiting Game! Yeehaww!

Well, I started bleeding yesterday while I was pushing that huge ton of weight around they call a grocery cart. It's not been very much bleeding, but more than I'm comfortable with. I take comfort in the fact that I've not had any cramping. I called the doctor yesterday and they're not too optimistic about the pregnancy. There isn't really anything they can do at this point, and I already knew that anyway. My doctor did advise me to put my feet up and take it easy.

My mother-in-law and husband were nice enough to clean up after dinner for me last night. It just goes to show that maybe Kevin does exhibit some emotion if he was concerned enough to actually help do dishes. Too bad I was too concerned about the pregnancy to really enjoy watching him at it for the first time!

Anyway, I called the doctor's office again today to see if they had the results from the beta hCG they did on Friday. My hCG had nearly doubled which is good, but my progesterone went from 9mg on Wednesday to 6.5mg on Friday. That's not good; in fact that's bad. Progesterone helps to sustain a pregnancy. If my body is not producing enough, I can loose this pregnancy. My understanding is it can also indicate that something is wrong with this pregnancy.

They prescribed me some progesterone pills but did it more for my benefit I think. The nurse really doesn't think it will make a difference either way. I don't think I ever had a problem with low progesterone before, but I don't really know because it was never measured before. I do know that I never had this kind of bleeding before except right before I had the abuption.

At this point, it's a waiting game. They will do another ultrasound on Tues 8/18 if I make it that long to see if there's a heartbeat. There's a high likelihood there won't even be an embryo in there.

I did have my substitute come in today and the rest of this week to help me with the daycare. And I have an aid hired that is going to start the following Monday. That will give me a chance to get my feet up and help protect this pregnancy if there's something in there well enough to save.

All we can do now is play the waiting game and hope for the best. I am trying to not hang all my hopes on a slim chance, and I can already see myself preparing for what I fear to be inevitable. I am already feeling disappointed, but if I loose this pregnancy I know we can try again. I am also going to ask that they monitor my progesterone prior to pregnancy to see if anything can be done to prevent this next time.

It just seems like the odds are starting to be stacked against us. I appreciate the fact more and more each day that we were able to have a healthy child from our first pregnancy and that it was untarnished by all this anxiety and complications. That's more than most people get who are faced with the problems we've been faced with recently.